When in Doubt – Look Inward

"The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another." – William James

Tryout Season

If you’re a parent with kids in competitive sports, you know the stress of tryout season. I am currently going through it.  It’s a whirlwind of emotions, not just for the kids but for the parents and coaches guiding them. Having been through this process as a player, leader, coach, and parent, I’ve realized that the advice and guidance I give to my 9-year-old isn’t so different from what I've learned through mentorship or coaching myself during many of life’s challenges.

Here’s what I’ve learned: When external pressures mount, the key to navigating them is focusing on what’s within our control.

Control Your Preparation

Athletes like Kobe Bryant, Michael Jordan, Wayne Gretzky, and Sidney Crosby all emphasize the same thing—the real work happens before game day. Whether it’s sports, a big presentation, or a crucial meeting at work, preparation is everything. Showing up tired, undernourished, or unprepared is setting yourself up for failure. You can control how you prepare your body and mind for the task ahead. Success begins long before the whistle blows or the meeting starts.

Control Your Effort

Your effort is the one thing you have 100% control over. Whether it's winning puck battles or being the hardest worker in the room, effort is the great equalizer. If you’re consistently outworking others, people will notice—whether it's a coach, a boss, or your team. Results come from effort, and effort is something no one can take away from you.

Control Your Mindset

Everything begins in your mind. Visualization, positivity, and energy—these are tools that give you an edge, not just in sports but in life. Imagine the plays you want to make or the outcomes you seek. Walk into every situation with confidence and bring unmatched enthusiasm. This doesn’t just boost your performance; it positively impacts those around you.

Block Out the Noise

Distractions are everywhere. Parents on the sidelines, social comparisons, or the pressure of others’ expectations—none of that is within your control. If it’s not in your hands, it’s not worth your focus. Your energy should be directed solely at what you can control: your preparation, effort, and mindset. Everything else? Block it out.

Have Fun

Finally, don’t forget to have fun. The best performers in sports, business, and life all say the same thing—they’re at their best when they’re enjoying what they do. When you’re loose, energized, and truly loving the process, everything feels more natural. Yes, there will be tough moments, but even in those, there’s room for joy. After all, if it isn’t fun, is it really worth pursuing?

Closing Thoughts:

"You have power over your mind, not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength." – Marcus Aurelius

External pressures are constant and often unnecessary. If we allow them to dictate our actions, they can rob us of the joy and fulfillment that comes from doing our best. When things feel overwhelming, the answer is to look inward. We control our preparation, effort, and mindset. By blocking out the noise and finding joy in the process, we can thrive—on the field, in the office, and in life.